In recent news, as most know by now, I got engaged to a Syrian here in Kuwait. There has been a lot of talk about religion, views, what I'm to expect, and how I'll be treated. I believe the best way to assure everyone of what's happening is to clarify everything from my point of view.
Anyway, Abdulrahman is his name (Abboud for short). He is sunni, though he is indifferent about it/even agnostic. Yes, maybe bad/good people exist here--just like everywhere, but he isn't good. He's great..and so is his whole family. They accepted me since the moment they met me--and I'm not the first American in their family, or even westerner.
He has been in Kuwait for a generation. His father came here (along with his 5 siblings) when they were either infants or yet to be born. His mother, 1 of 8, (who is originally from Palestine, but holds a Syrian nationality) has been in Kuwait her whole life. They fell in love in a very adorable way. His mother worked as a secretary and his father sold office furniture/supplies. He came to her company and fell in love at first sight. He came back more than once to try to find out more about her, even watched her come out of work from his car (while playing Julio Iglesias loudly in hopes to get her attention), and finally manned up and asked her out. On their first date he only had a quarter KWD (like 2 dollars) and told her he wasn't hungry so he could afford to pay for her meal. He told her to order anything, but was really hoping she'd get something obviously in his price range. Well, long story short, they got married and had 4 kids. Mohammad, Abdulrahman, and the twins: Mariam and Yousef.
I met Abboud on my second day here. I was exploring Marina Mall (one of the most popular malls in Kuwait), I made it to the seaside part of the mall--which is full of cafés and restaurants, and he was with a group of friends. Seeing I was clearly lost, exploring and new, his friend Haydar invited me to their table for coffee. We spent hours talking and at the end of the night all exchanged numbers. Abboud and I were non-stop texting and met up the next night for shawarma (which I consider our first date). From that night, we were inseparable. After 2 months, he introduced me to his family. They welcomed me into their home and invited me each Friday for family lunch. I have spent a lot of time with his family and his sister (whom is 19), even invited me out for shisha with her friends. His mom took me to get a manicure with her. And his dad took me nearly every day for all that work that I needed to have done for my driver's license here.
And when his mom had a stroke, I was at the hospital every day by her and Abbouds side. And it's not just his immediate family I met, I've met the extended. His aunts and uncles all live in Kuwait. His aunt Amani was at his house every day, so when I was there, I also spent time with her. She invited me into her household for lunch, even when Abboud was at work. So even when I heard of her also having a stroke while I was in the states, and it being serious and that she wouldn't make it, I wanted to fly back to Kuwait earlier to be there for Abboud and his family. After she passed, I was in Kuwait and able to be there for his family, say our last goodbyes. I met even more of his family during this time. Even distant cousins.
His dad's sister is actually married to a Kuwaiti man and is extremely happy. Her son (abbouds favorite cousin) is the reason he even grew up learning English. He wasn't in "English Schools", he learned through his family members and TV. His favorite shows growing up being Seinfeld, Married with Children, and Friends. That cousin ended up studying medicine in Richmond, Virginia for 8 years and recently moved back to Kuwait. Abboud has another 2 cousins (twins) Hadi and Fadi who each studied in America...Boston, MA and Louisiana. Hadi and Fadi each have non-muslim girlfriends (one from Russia, other American). His family is VERY welcoming and open. Religion, race, nationality--none of it matters.
They don't expect me to convert. They've never asked. Actually, they celebrated Easter with me--or at least we attempted to though I couldn't find food coloring to make Easter eggs. I did find fake ones that we hid around his house and did a Easter Egg Hunt. We (my American/Canadian friends) were supposed to have Thanksgiving at his house, and his mother was going to help cook, but we ended up doing a pot-luck style elsewhere. And his cousin Mishari (the one who studied medicine in America) has agreed to cook a full thanksgiving meal at his place this year, he loves American holidays.
Upon getting engaged his father even had a talk with me about Islam. He wanted to ensure me that I have nothing to worry about. Abboud wouldn't be taking on a second wife (his family is 100% against that) and even if he were someone who would try that, he would have to ask me first and I have the right to deny him. When we get married, Abboud and I set a dowry/amount of money that Abbouds family will pay me for getting married and for if we get divorced. That means if we get divorced, he pays me ___ KWD and also monthly money based on his salary for if we have kids, etc. Speaking of children--I would get them if they're under 14 years old, otherwise they can choose. Yes, our children would be muslim. Abboud and I have had this discussion, but they will also be Catholic. Labeled muslim, but they will learn both traditions, religions, holidays and choose when they're old enough.
His family is religious. They are practicing Muslims. But that isn't a negative thing. They aren't extremists, they aren't terrorists, and they aren't preachers. They respect everyones choices, whether they're good or bad. At first they did tell Abboud he should find another muslim, and asked "are you sure she's the one...this is who your heart found?" Of course yes is the answer. We are extremely happy together. I've never known anyone more in a short period of time. We've connected and I truly believe our hearts found each other--maybe it's even fate. Why else would the world have brought me to Kuwait? It's something meant to be. He treats me really well, and for those of you who know my personality--you know I wouldn't have it any other way. Equality is a must for me--I wouldn't let someone take my identity away. I'm a strong, independent person and I always will be.
Abboud may post a blog later about Islam. Though he isn't a practicing Muslim, he obviously know's way more about it than I do.
I'm centrally located, 10 minute walk from the main road here, 2 min walk from a grocery store, 1 min walk from a Quick Chek type of store, across the street from an about to open bowling alley/sports arena, and in a set of buildings full of other teachers and Americans.
It's a lovely 2 bed, 2 bath with a balcony. Not really anything else to ask for when it comes to Kuwait apartments. It's twice the size of where I used to live and in an area that is thriving with entertainment. I'd say this is going to be a good year. Once the temperature started to cool down--aka get to the high 80s/low 90s--I'll be walking all over to really discover the area. Currently, we're typically ranging from 107degrees to 118 degrees here! The only times I can go outside without my glasses fogging up immediately from the current humidity are anytime after 6pm to before 10am. Once noon hits, forget it...don't even wear your glasses because you won't be able to see until you step back into AC.
Side note: My college sent me an email requesting for current information. They wanted to add me to their alumni list since I was recommended as someone who went off to do interesting things since college. :) Here is that link... Renee Lycoming Website
